Journey of Discovery by
Becky
Part 4: Coming to Terms
After
accepting that I was an abductee, I began a very personal
journey to find the truth. I have never been someone to sit
back and pretend something isn’t going on. I do much better
when I confront things head on, even if that is difficult in the
short term. This attitude eventually led me to explore my
experiences with the use of hypnosis. It was not a decision I
made lightly or quickly. I struggled with it for over two years
before beginning. I was quite concerned with false memory
syndrome as I was focused on finding the truth, not someone
else’s agenda.
As I look
back over many hypnosis sessions now, I know it was the right
decision for me. It has been both difficult and enlightening,
but overall I have gotten a tremendous amount out of it. I feel
quite strongly that these are real memories, not false ones.
The events I have explored fit into the larger picture of my
life like the missing pieces of a puzzle. Behavior that once
seemed odd is suddenly explainable. I now understand what my
“sleepwalking” really was and I know how I got locked out of the
house. I know why things with large eyes scare me, and I think
that given what I was going through, my fear of the dark was
quite reasonable at the time.
It has been
a long journey to get to where I am today, and at the age of 42,
the journey is still ongoing. I have chosen to continue with
the hypnosis, even though it is difficult at times. I still
believe knowing the truth and putting the pieces – all of the
pieces - of my life together in a coherent form is better than
ignoring a major portion of it. I like knowing why I feel a
certain way or why I acted in some fashion. I don’t like being
a part of this phenomenon, and that is something I will most
likely always struggle with. I would love to find a reasonable
alternate explanation for all of this, but in my heart I doubt
that will happen. I would also like to find a way to stop my
abductions, but again, that is unlikely and I have faced that
fact. Until something changes, knowing the truth is the best I
can do for both myself and for my family.
Part 1 | Part 2
| Part 3 | Part 4 |
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